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The Art of Camouflage, Survival, and Pretending Everything Is Under Control

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“HELP! I Dropped Food on My Blouse in a Restaurant!” Ladies, gentlemen, and innocent victims of gravity…  Let us discuss one of the greatest fashion tragedies ever created by humanity:  dropping food directly on your blouse while inside a restaurant.  Not beside it.  Not near it.   Not “almost.”  Direct hit.   And somehow — mysteriously — it always happens when: you are wearing white, trying to look attractive, sitting near people, or making eye contact with someone important.

The Art of Camouflage, Survival, and Pretending Everything Is Under Control

“HELP! I Dropped Food on My Blouse in a Restaurant!” Ladies, gentlemen, and innocent victims of gravity…  Let us discuss one of the greatest fashion tragedies ever created by humanity:  dropping food directly on your blouse while inside a restaurant.  Not beside it.  Not near it.   Not “almost.”  Direct hit.   And somehow — mysteriously — it always happens when: you are wearing white, trying to look attractive, sitting near people, or making eye contact with someone important.

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